"Momma, please start making memory books for us again!"

I walked into your bedroom the other day and you were both sprawled out reading the blog books I had printed for you and laughing hysterically. It never crossed my mind that you would enjoy reading them at 10 years old. I speculated that maybe, someday in your 30's, you would get a chuckle out of reading some of your childhood memories through the eyes of your mother. You both stated how much you love them and how you wished I would continue documenting these memories. So ... at your request, I will do my best!

Too much has happened in the past 5 or 6 years to detail the events of your amazing lives so I will do a brief recap:

1) The most tragic and life changing thing was the passing of your beautiful, fun loving, ever so witty Nana. She passed away on March 24, 2014, 4 days before my 40th birthday and one month and one day before her 70th birthday. It was horrible. It all happened so fast, except the last 3 days of her life. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's 2 years prior to her death. We knew something was going on for years prior to the diagnosis but she was the master disguiser. She could trick the doctors and knew the right things to say to avoid further testing. You girls probably remember the day she was actually diagnosed because it was the first time you had every seen me cry. You were 5 years old and we went with Paw Paw and Nana to her doctor's appointment at the Neurology clinic. Nana and Paw Paw walked us to the car afterwards, Nana helped you get buckled in and we said our goodbyes. I maintained my composure until they walked away. I cried hysterically the whole way home. You guys were perfectly silent. You were too young to realize the enormity of the situation but on some level you knew things would never be the same. We spent the next 18 months spending as much time as we could with Nana. We took her with us everywhere and even went on a few trips. She was still Nana but was slipping away a little bit at a time. Her life revolved around the two of you, just like it always had since the day you were born. The pure unconditional love that you shared with her was beautiful to watch. Although I'd give anything to have her with us today, I wouldn't trade the time we had with her for nothing. I fear that as you get older you will forget how much you loved her and how close you were to her. But part of me is glad those memories are fading because you are not sad everyday like you were every day and night in the months after her passing. Without her in our daily lives there is a giant piece of all of our hearts missing.

2) Our precious Ruby passed away suddenly and unexpectedly on December 23, 2015. We are not sure what happened, her Vet suspects brain cancer or some type of neurological disorder. I happened fast without any suffering or hard decisions to make. We were with her when she passed away and we brought her home. She looked so beautiful. Daddy made her a "tomb" as you guys call it and we painted it with happy colors and wrote her sweet love notes. We buried her in our backyard near her favorite spot on her hill. It was a sad, sad day and we still miss her every single day. Paw Paw came to comfort us and be with us and Conner helped Daddy dig the hole. She was an amazing dog that gave us 12 years of unconditional love and countless laughs. We laugh about what a bad puppy she was by eating all of our remote controls or anything electronic, chewing off the side post of our brand new bed and how crazy she got around other dogs. But boy oh boy did she grow up to be spectacular! She was the best traveler. And we were so worried about how she would do with you guys when we brought you home from the hospital. We would bring home your dirty blankets from the NICU to let her sniff them. She fell in love with you both the second we brought you home and never left your side. She made it her life mission to protect you for the 9 1/2 years you had with her. She was our first baby and will forever be in our hearts.

3) You have both survived pre K, Kindergarten, 1st grade, 2nd grade and 3rd grade at Sacred Heart. You both kicked butt in school thus far with all A's. Third grade was tough but with a little hard work and perseverance, we survived. And I say "we" because it was a joint effort. Hassie Clare - your love for reading began in the 2nd grade. Now you read as many books as you can and as often as you can. Mainly so that you can take AR tests and get the highest number of AR points  - you are very competitive:) Quinn - you do what is required of you to meet your goals in reading but you excel at Math. You are both very good students and at the top of your class.

4) Sports!!! My or my .. where do I begin. Here are the sports on your resume to date - gymnastics, dance, softball, tennis, basketball, volleyball and a few golf camps. We have weeded them down to softball, basketball and tennis. It was heart breaking to see you give up gymnastics but you reached the maximum level without going competitive, which means you would have to give up all of your other sports. Quinn - you were stunning on the balance bean. Hassie Clare - you were unbelievable on the floor exercise. You are both AMAZING athletes. Your natural ability amazes everyone. I love coaching you in softball and basketball, although it has its challenges.  But no matter what, I wouldn't trade it for anything. I can't wait to see what the future holds!

5) Pool - Daddy and I decided it was time to fulfill Mommy's life long dream of having our very own swimming pool. We started construction in Sept. 20013 and finished in April 2014. We have enjoyed it immensely and feel very blessed. When it is just the 4 of us out there it really feels like we are a million miles away from the hustle and bustle of life. There are no phones, ipads, chores...although Daddy recently added a TV under the patio to watch our beloved Cardinal games. The quality time we spend together in that pool as a family is priceless. It should be paid off by the time you start middle school!

6) Vacations - We have spent our vacation time and money on trips to the lake (we bought a boat in 2009 .. I think), our pool, visiting friends and a few trips to the beach. We got lucky - you guys LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the lake. For the past 2 years you have picked a lake trip over having a party and getting a present. This makes me so proud! From an early age you both would rather spend time with us at the lake for your birthday then anything else. This tickles my heart. I try to make it special. For your 9th birthday we rented this adorable little cabin at Greers Ferry Lake in Arkansas. We boated, hiked and jumped off cliffs. I love taking you to a store (grocery store, convenient store, gift store ... whatever we come across) and telling you "go crazy .... get anything you want." Right now you pick junk food, mostly candy, and sugary cereal. This year for your birthday you both wanted to go back to Greer Ferry Lake. We rented a condo in Fairfield Bay that was probably really nice 30 years ago. We had an awesome time and it was our first trip with our new puppy Georgia .... more on her later. We spent a lot of time on the lake, playing on the water and jumping off cliffs. Especially Quinnie .. the higher the better. She is a dare devil at heart!

This recap wasn't exactly brief but I summed up all the big events as best as I could. Seeing how much pleasure it brings you guys to read your "blog books" has really encouraged me to pick this back up. Even if I only get one entry a week and two entries a month ..... it will be better than nothing!!! One thing that hasn't changed in the past 5 or 6 years, or since my last blog entry, I still wonder daily how I got so darn lucky by having 2 of the most beautiful, sensitive, caring, helpful, loving, funny kids in the whole world! Being your Mother is the greatest gift EVER! I'm thankful for you both each and every day ... even when you make me turn into a crazy lady!

1st day of 4th grade

4th grade  - Sr. Caroline & Mrs. Daleke  - This is the first time you guys have been in separate homeroom classes … at your request of course.

Funnies

While on my sabbatical from blogging, I started a post called "Funnies" earlier this year in Jan 2013 but never finished it. I added a few more things to it from sticky notes I had on my desk.

6.5 to 7 years old

• Hassie Clare knows every single word to Vanilla Ice's song Ice Ice Baby. She sings it NON STOP and claims it is her favorite song. Her favorite band is Queen. She thinks it is the greatest music of all time and has told me many times how she really feels and understands their music. Lord help me.
• Both my girls think their school cafeteria has the best food ever (shows you how good of a cook I am). They get to pick which day they want to buy it once a week. It's $4 per kid. They picked today and it was saulsberry steak, mashed taters and gravy, green beans, corn, apples and milk. When I picked them up from school they were both raving about how good their lunch was and how they ate every single bite off their plate. HC says "I ate everything but I didn't get any gravy." Quinn excitedly said, "What!!! You didn't get gravy? It is absolutely humiliating not to get gravy on your mashed taters because it is the best thing ever." I love how she uses big words incorrectly .... just like her momma.
• Quinn had a scab on her knee (formally a strawberry) she got from falling down during indoor soccer. In her most southern voice she said, "Mommy, the scab on my strawbelly feels like a peach seed. Can peach seeds come out of your body?"
• Randomly, after Mass one Saturday in the car on our way home, Quinnie stated that she has seen me cry very hard before like Mary did when her son Jesus died (something from church must have prompted this). She said that they saw me cry after we left the doctor with Nana and Papa when it was hot outside (summertime). So I thought it was a good time to explain to them that I was crying because the doctor told us some bad news about Nana. They told us she has a disease in her brain called Alzheimer's and that it makes her forget things sometimes. Quinn started crying uncontrollable. I had to pull over and love on her because I felt so bad. It was like she somehow understood the severity of Alzheimer's. After she calmed down a bit but was still sniffling she said, "why does God allow people to have Odd Timers or any disease? Why can't he take it away?" Hassie Clare quickly replied, "We can ask Daddy's phone (Siri) and find out the answer!" If only it were that easy my witty Hassie Clare! Finding humor while going through all this has been my only saving grace.
• When I come home from Bunko the girls tell me my breathe smells like beard. (I'm pretty sure they mean beer.)
• Words they say that I will never correct ... and will pierce someone's eyeballs out if they correct them:  Where is the munrote? (AKA remote) Please plause the movie and unplause it when I get back. (AKA - pause)
• Their 1st grade teach is Sr. Margaret Sue. It is the 3rd month of school and they still think her name is Sr. Margaret Suess.
• Both girls are suddenly aware of the hair on their legs and they say it grows longer every day now that they are in first grade. They asked how old you have to be to shave and I told them it would probably be in Junior High School. Quinn blurted out, "Good gravy. My leg hair will be longer then the hair on my head by then. Can we at least go get it cut in the 3rd grade?" HC is a hairy little monkey like her Daddy.  
•  Jamie recently grew a goatee for the first time since the girls have been born. Hassie Clare loves it and says he looks "soooooooo handsome." Every time we mention it Quinnie yells "Shave it. I hate it. It poinks me and makes me itchy when we snuggle."  

Cherishing Mommy Moments

Last night I was holding Hassie Clare like a baby (a very long baby), all wrapped up in her favorite blanket on my chest, while rocking her in our beloved rocker / recliner that I almost got rid of 2 weeks ago (thankfully Quinnie said she would not be ready to get rid of it until she was 9). Hass was crying and upset because she was nervous about going to school today after being home sick the past two days with me. She didn't want to leave me. She said she had been with me for 2 days and never wanted to leave me, ever and if she did she didn't think she could breathe. She cried and cried as I held her, rocked her and kissed her all over but I was secretly bursting with prideful enjoyment. The more she cried, the more my heart swelled with love. Suddenly I had a panicking feeling and I was very aware that feeling that I wanted to remember this moment forever but then I was suddenly aware that this gut-wrenching mommy love my daughters have for me will soon dissipate .... at least until they are in their late 20's. But it will never be the same. Never. And then I became sad and utterly frantic that I won't remember these blissful Mommy moments.

So ..... I am back to blogging after a 13 month sabbatical. Something tells me I will need to hold onto and remember every loving, sweet moment with my girls before they hit the double digits!

Occasionally we pull out the blog books that I had printed out for them. We already enjoy reading the stories and looking at the pictures from toddlerhood. Missing from our blog book collection will be September 2012-October 2013 (all of Kindergarten and the summer of 2013). That is why I'm sad.

Hassie Clare and Quinn - I plan on showing you this blog entry in 7 years when you are a teenager:

• You both tell me daily that I'm the best Mommy in the world.
• Every night before bed you require lots of hugs, kisses, snuggling and you always yell "ONE LAST HUG & KISS" as I'm walking out of your room.
• Q - you sucker your Daddy into snuggling with you every night. Ya'll hold hands and spoon. It is precious. You have made him promise that he will always snuggle with you like that even when you are a grown up.
• HC - it is impossible for you to go to sleep if you think we are upset with you or if you are guilty of something. You always get out of bed 20 minutes later and do the walk of shame over to our room with your little head hung down and your long, curly, brown hair draped over your face. You confess all of your sins without us even asking.
• You are both becoming very curious about your bodies. You ask me all kinds of questions and never hold back. I love it and I always try to give you honest answers. Even when you ask me how old you will be when your boobies will "fall over" like mine! I hope that you both will always feel comfortable talking to me about your ever-changing bodies.
• Anytime we are up at your school, which is often, you are both so full of pride.
• When I pick you up at school you run and leap into my arms. Every single day!
• You hate boys. Especially you Quinn. You don't even want to play in the same room as them, let alone be friends with them. Smart girl!
• The bond between you two is stronger than any bond I've ever witnessed. It is amazingly beautiful. Sometimes I worry if you can survive independently from one another. I hope we never have to find out! #samecollege #neighborsforlife
• I kiss the palm of each of your hands every morning before you leave for school so that if you miss me you can place your open had over your heart and feel me. #thekissinghandisourfavoritebook
• HC - you woke up very excited this morning because I told you I would spray my perfume on something special and hide it in your backpack today so that you could pull it out and smell it when you missed me. This made your heart happy! I sprayed my Disneyworld perfume (one of my favorite scents you and your sister picked out for me in France at Epcot) on an old piece of one of Nana's nightgowns.

I love being your Mom and I can't put into words how grateful I am to be blessed with this privilege. I will cherish these days for the rest of my life! Thank you for being the greatest kids ever. EVER!


PS - Hi Maema! I'm 99.9999% sure that you are the only one that ever checks my blog anymore:)

 

Merry Christmas 2012

Our little humanitarian

My sweet, sweet Quinnie Ray. She carries the weight of the world on her shoulders. She secretly and quietly worries about anything and everything. Nothing is too big or small for her to worry about. She worries about world hunger, fire, patients at St. Jude, Daddy's heart, her tennis shoe laces, her sister's tiny scratch with a scab on it, what her snack will be at school. You name it ... she worries about it.  Every single morning when she leaves for school she worries that her "kids" will be scared and miss her. So she wraps them in her Bebe (the thing that provides her the most comfort in the world besides her Momma), gives them kisses and puts them around the house where she likes to be. When I pick them up from school she will look me square in the eyes and ask me how many times I checked on them while she was in school. She has a heart of gold. She swears she never wants to have children but I bet she will have a house full!

Sealey, Dumbo, Speckles and Speckles big sister Cheetah Bear on her bed.

Fuzzy sitting in her chair in the kitchen.

Maddy Nacho and Lady Bug snuggling on the kitchen table, looking at the door so they can see her come home.

Maddy Nacho wrapped in her Bebe reading a book on Quinn's favorite spot on the coach.

Your kindergarten soccer coach rocks!

fall camping trip

We needed a break from the hustle and bustle of life so we packed up after our Friday night soccer game and headed to the lake.  I was afraid that camping in cooler weather would be a bit boring. I should have known better! Our little outdoor girls loved every second of our weekend and begged to stay longer. We biked, hiked, explored, rested and ate like kings.  Thank goodness our little redneck camper has heated beds and a heater.

Home away from home

Rubes found being a lake as peaceful and relaxing as we do.

First time we have been brave enough to take Ruby camping with us. She LOVED it!

We are so fortunate to be able to do things like this and I promise never to take it for granted!

On the way out of town ate at our favorite lake pizza place. Ruby even joined us at our table:)

$100 popcorn

If you purchase $100 or more of overpriced gourmet popcorn (fundraiser for the school) your child / children get to come to a pizza and movie night at school and wear their PJ's. Doesn't that sound like a bargain? Geesh. I volunteered to work the event last year because there was no way I was dropping my pre-Ker's off during the night at a new school and I figured it was a good way to earn some service hours. That will NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN. This year I walked them in and said "see ya in 2 hours lady bugs. Peace out!" The event is crazy, insanely chaotic with 100 tired 4-10 year olds running around while jacked up on sugar. INSANE ... but Hassie Clare and Quinn LOVE it!

Quinn, BFF Olivia and Hassie Clare

I think they are trying to establish some rules....maybe a pecking order.  Olivia and Quinn like to follow the rules. Hassie Clare ... not so much.

Quinnie's Toothsesss

My girls LOVE LOVE LOVE their dentist and his office.

Quinn finally lost her first tooth the night before her bi-annual dentist appointment. Or should I say ... her grown up tooth finally pushed it out. She was so, so, so excited! It helped tremendously that her sister lost a tooth first because she new it wouldn't hurt. Again, Quinn does not like change or anything that feels odd or different on or about her body (lotions, clothing, hair, etc.). She is MAJORLY psychotic particular about this stuff.  She worries and stews about it for days.

They look forward to going to the dentist and ask me at least twice a month when their next appointment is to see Dr. Jason. I think the endless supply of cheap toys and stickers they get to pick out helps!

So she followed suit and wrote a letter to the tooth fairy.  Pinky (our tooth fairy) left her 2 one dollar bills and a gold $1 coin with a letter asking her to save the special gold coin, donate $1 to her beloved charity and spend $1 on anything she wanted. She left fairy dust EVERYWHERE and came in through a small crack in the window.

Coincidentally the next morning we had a dentist appointment. Excellent reports on both girls. Their 6 year old molars are coming in  - HC faster then Quinn's. And he said Quinn's other bottom tooth needed to come out and that it might be the difference in braces or no braces down the road. PULL THAT SUCKER OUT!

Of course we didn't even mention it to Quinn. Now a days they don't give shots to pull teeth. He just packed it full of numbing gel for several minutes and yanked it out with some plier like contraption. My stomach contracted and I turned white as a ghost at the sight of him pulling it out ... grossed me out. Quinn was a rock star and so proud of herself. It bleed for an hour and left a nice little hole.

Before tooth extraction.

After

She said when her mouth is asleep (numb) it makes her eyes sleepy:)

I pray they have their daddy's teeth and not mine. Jamie has perfectly straight teeth and has never had any problems. My teeth (and most of my families teeth) are horrendous. Braces for years, retainers, surgery, even had 4 permanent teeth pulled because my mouth was so crowded (notice that I don't have eye teeth), crowns, root canals. You name it and I've had it. And I probably have the best teeth out of my siblings. So pleeeaassseee let them have their Daddy's teeth!

My sweet little Kinderbears / First day of Kindergarten

My babies are growing up and I'm so very proud of them. Since we did junior kindergarten at this school, going to senior kindergarten wasn't that being of a deal to Hassie Clare and Quinn. Although I was not near as emotional as I was last year on the their first day of school, I was still a bit weepy. They have matured so much over this past year and they are defiantly ready for Kindergarten.

Their teacher is lovely. Hassie Clare and Quinn quickly took over the classroom. Their teacher calls them her little assistants. Quinn is quick to point out any mistakes she makes and Hassie Clare loves to run errands for her at the school.

Here are some pics from the first week of school:

Quinn - first day of Kindergarten. Happy, excited and a little nervous. She kept her Bebe close by but wasn't allowed to take it to school:(  I kept in her car seat for her all day and it was there as soon as she got out of school.

Hassie Clare - first day of Kindergarten. Eager, off the wall excited and thankful that her sister is in her class. I read them "The Kissing Hand" that morning and kissed the palms of their hands. If they missed me during the day they could open their hand and feel my kisses. Hassie Clare said my kisses wore off by lunch time and she missed me so much it hurt her belly. Such a sweet book!

Kindergartners have homework twice a week.

Quinn is clearly not too happy. She is still as picky as ever about her clothing, socks, underclothes, hair, etc. I think on this particular morning she was a bit disheveled because it was "wear your tennis shoes to school day" and Quinn does not like change!

Goodbye Summer 2012

Goodbye summer 2012 - you have been very, very good to us. 3 vacations, 2 long weekend getaways, 2 camping trips, lots of swimming, a handful of trips to the lake, tons of yard play and local adventures, good times with good friends, sleeping in until it was time to get up and play, sleepovers in Mommy and Daddy's bed and the list goes on and on. We spent as much time with Nana as possible and enjoyed it immensely. We rode bikes, went on hikes, swam anywhere and everywhere we were allowed, stayed up late, ate Gracie Blue's tri-weekly and wore whatever the heck we wanted 90% of the time.

We are already looking forward to seeing you again next year!

Random pics from Summer 2012:

Quinn (left) and Hassie Clare (right) with their summer babysitter.

Hassie Clare - I can't even begin to tell you how often I would turn around while driving and see her chilling in the backseat while wearing snorkeling gear. Goof ball!

Dining at our favorite cafe - Newk's.

Now that both the girls can swim well we went swimming every chance we got!

Mass with Nana and Papa.

Camp at The Kids Only gym.

Enjoyed time reading lots and lots of books with the girls this summer. They are so close to reading! Reading with my niece Paisley (and acting silly cause my goof ball sister is a camera Nazi:)  in this picture.

Lots of snuggle time with Nana.

Lots of birthday parties (HC with Ava - my Goddaughter).

I LOVE their imagination. They spent hours every day creating different "pretend" scenarios while I worked. This is the hall way Thurman veterinarian office outside my office.

Maema came to visit us in her snazzy new cute car. Obviously Onyx liked it also:)

Snuggled on the couch watching movies and killing time while Mommy worked from home.

Quinn and Paisley playing Papa's organ.

Quinn was really sick one week so I took Hassie Clare to Nana and Papa's house while I took care of Quinn while working. She is laying in my lap on a pillow and holding her Bebe while I worked. Jamie sent me a text asking how Quinnie was feeling and I responded to him with this pic.

Wonderful weekend at Old Hickory Lake with the Ofenheusle's. This blurry pic (only pic I took all weekend) is of the kiddos having a sleepover and watching a movie while the adults had dance party USA and a Cornhole tourney out back. They were wiped out after a day of boating, swimming and tubing on the lake. Ahhh ... good times!  

jkl

These little turkeys ate and entire tub of Pancho Dip one day while I was in the back working. Look at those smirky little guilty grins!

Bathing beauties

Quinn and her masterpeice at Art class.

Hassie Clare and her masterpiece at Art class.

It makes my heart so full and happy that these 2 little girls are so close. They are together 24/7 and their connection and their unbelievably tight bond is amazing to witness. They are always together and never far away from one another. I tell them all the time that they are so lucky to have each other and on some 6 year old level I think they know it!