Cherishing Mommy Moments

Last night I was holding Hassie Clare like a baby (a very long baby), all wrapped up in her favorite blanket on my chest, while rocking her in our beloved rocker / recliner that I almost got rid of 2 weeks ago (thankfully Quinnie said she would not be ready to get rid of it until she was 9). Hass was crying and upset because she was nervous about going to school today after being home sick the past two days with me. She didn't want to leave me. She said she had been with me for 2 days and never wanted to leave me, ever and if she did she didn't think she could breathe. She cried and cried as I held her, rocked her and kissed her all over but I was secretly bursting with prideful enjoyment. The more she cried, the more my heart swelled with love. Suddenly I had a panicking feeling and I was very aware that feeling that I wanted to remember this moment forever but then I was suddenly aware that this gut-wrenching mommy love my daughters have for me will soon dissipate .... at least until they are in their late 20's. But it will never be the same. Never. And then I became sad and utterly frantic that I won't remember these blissful Mommy moments.

So ..... I am back to blogging after a 13 month sabbatical. Something tells me I will need to hold onto and remember every loving, sweet moment with my girls before they hit the double digits!

Occasionally we pull out the blog books that I had printed out for them. We already enjoy reading the stories and looking at the pictures from toddlerhood. Missing from our blog book collection will be September 2012-October 2013 (all of Kindergarten and the summer of 2013). That is why I'm sad.

Hassie Clare and Quinn - I plan on showing you this blog entry in 7 years when you are a teenager:

• You both tell me daily that I'm the best Mommy in the world.
• Every night before bed you require lots of hugs, kisses, snuggling and you always yell "ONE LAST HUG & KISS" as I'm walking out of your room.
• Q - you sucker your Daddy into snuggling with you every night. Ya'll hold hands and spoon. It is precious. You have made him promise that he will always snuggle with you like that even when you are a grown up.
• HC - it is impossible for you to go to sleep if you think we are upset with you or if you are guilty of something. You always get out of bed 20 minutes later and do the walk of shame over to our room with your little head hung down and your long, curly, brown hair draped over your face. You confess all of your sins without us even asking.
• You are both becoming very curious about your bodies. You ask me all kinds of questions and never hold back. I love it and I always try to give you honest answers. Even when you ask me how old you will be when your boobies will "fall over" like mine! I hope that you both will always feel comfortable talking to me about your ever-changing bodies.
• Anytime we are up at your school, which is often, you are both so full of pride.
• When I pick you up at school you run and leap into my arms. Every single day!
• You hate boys. Especially you Quinn. You don't even want to play in the same room as them, let alone be friends with them. Smart girl!
• The bond between you two is stronger than any bond I've ever witnessed. It is amazingly beautiful. Sometimes I worry if you can survive independently from one another. I hope we never have to find out! #samecollege #neighborsforlife
• I kiss the palm of each of your hands every morning before you leave for school so that if you miss me you can place your open had over your heart and feel me. #thekissinghandisourfavoritebook
• HC - you woke up very excited this morning because I told you I would spray my perfume on something special and hide it in your backpack today so that you could pull it out and smell it when you missed me. This made your heart happy! I sprayed my Disneyworld perfume (one of my favorite scents you and your sister picked out for me in France at Epcot) on an old piece of one of Nana's nightgowns.

I love being your Mom and I can't put into words how grateful I am to be blessed with this privilege. I will cherish these days for the rest of my life! Thank you for being the greatest kids ever. EVER!


PS - Hi Maema! I'm 99.9999% sure that you are the only one that ever checks my blog anymore:)